In my book, Why Good People Can’t Leave Bad Relationships,” I refer to the self-serving narcissists of the world as “The Unfixables.” These are the kinds of people who never take responsibility for their actions and listed below are some of their favorite tricks.
1. Deny, deny, and deny again. They try to make us think that we’re crazy and nothing ever happened.
2. Lie, lie, lie and lie some more. They will just twist and turn the truth so much that we don’t know which way is up.
3. Blame, shame, and scapegoat others, and this way, they take the heat off of themselves.
4. Bribe, bribe, bribe or convince others to help them cover-up their wrong-doings, claiming it wasn’t their fault in the first place, and the whole thing is just a big misunderstanding.
5. Minimize what was done: They try to convince us that it was no big deal.
6. They act like they don’t remember what happened, or they somehow forgot the details.
7. They use intimidation tactics to scare us off or shut us up. They attack us and our character and claim that we have some ulterior motive for destroying them.
8. They threaten to hurt us or destroy us, either personally or professionally, if we don’t back off. They also threaten to hurt those we love.
9. They destroy or alter evidence, such as: deleting emails and text messages. They plant evidence against others, such as: tampering with our emails or putting something on our desk or in our possession that makes us look guilty.
10. Hire the best lawyers money can buy, so they can further manipulate the truth, this time with expert help, paid witnesses, and by stalling your legal proceedings.