Six Simple Strategies to a Saner Relationship
Is your relationship bringing out the worst in the two of you?
Does every conversation lead to a fight? Do you both end up feeling frustrated and angry, and yet, you don’t know how to stop doing what you’re doing?
If you both still love each other, then perhaps you’ve just gotten into a bad habit of negatively interacting with each other. In that case, deep, dark psychological counseling probably isn’t what the two of you need.
Some simple, day-to-day, behavior modification techniques, which the two of you can practice together, may be all you need to get your relationship back on track.
Share the following six, simple strategies to a saner relationship with your mate, and make a vow, sealed with a kiss, to follow them.
1). Share what’s on you mind with each other. Suppressing and denying your feelings will only backfire in the long run. If you have something to say: say it, mean it, but don’t be mean about it. If there’s a pink elephant in your living room, then say so.
2). Listen when your mate talks, and don’t interrupt, interject, or put your two cents in, until your mate finishes.
3). Stay on the topic at hand, and don’t bring up a thousand other gripes.
4). Stick to the facts, and leave the exaggerations, half-truths, and manipulations out of things.
5). No matter how tempting it may be, do not bring up old fights. Stay in the present, and don’t project into the nebulous future.
6). Do not use attack words, curses, or start with the whole name-calling-thing.
After a few days of following the above simple strategies, you will break the bad habit of nitpicking, nagging, and all of the other resultant nonsense, that this kind of negative behavior tends to bring out in the two of you, will cease to be.
You’ll be pleasantly surprised by the newer, kinder, gentler way of communicating that will soon become second nature to the two of you.
Cindi Sansone-Braff, “The Romance Whisperer,” is the author ofGrant Me a Higher Love, a spiritual, self-help relationship book.
She is a relationship coach with a twist: she talks with the dead to help the living end dysfunction. She has been named Best Psychic four years in a row by The Long Island Press, and has been recommended by Newsday. Visit her web site at:www.grantmeahigherlove.com.